Expectations

There are these things called expectations

The things I have been programmed to expect

Worse case scenario, heartache, and death

I have learned time and again that to have hope

Is the riskiest thing I can allow myself to do

Because as soon as I hope for my parents’ marriage

They start talking about divorce again

As soon as I hope to find friends

I start loosing them

As soon as I hope for a lover

It all starts to fall apart

Except with you.

You see

You are rewiring my brain

Because you are here

Breaking my expectation that you’d leave

I can feel hope creeping in

My first instinct is to crush it

Before it can crush me

But you keep loving me

You keep holding me

And kissing me late into the night

You don’t meet my expectations

You are breaking them

Turning them to dust

And building a platform for real love

To stand upon

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